Thursday, May 26, 2011

Class #86-99 with several Amsa Instructors

Hello! So it has been a long time and a lot has happened (though not near as much yoga as I'd hoped). The biggest event in my life right now is my wife and I's pregnancy. We are 20 weeks in (halfway) and every day gets more exciting. I don't know if 365 classes are going to happen this year, but I will be going to a lot in between baby shopping, doctor visits, and getting our home ready for a little one. So I thought I would check in and briefly talk about three of my recent favorite yoga experiences.

3)Led Zeppelin Rock Asana

So the Rock Asanas by Amsa are always awesome and this one was no different. The music was cool, but I really love anything that brings a bunch of people together in a positive way. Amanda also was able to attend so that made it doubly special. Kimberly also did a very wonderful job of syncing up asanas with the music. Feeling connected with each other and the music was a truly special feeling.

2)Small class with Sara

So big classes have their own energy, but a small class can be cool too. One of the challenges for any teacher is finding a way to balance how they present instruction to students of varying skill levels and experience. In this class Sara took advantage of the size to really push me and her words and adjustments added up to a challenge that was a little more than I thought I could do, but it turns out I had it in me. Thanks for setting the bar high and believing in me.

1)Dynamic Flow with Kimberly

This class actually was just yesterday. It was another rare time when Amanda and I were both able to go together. I have always been inspired by my wife, but her grace and patience during this pregnancy have made me even more appreciative of how special she is. Amanda had a little yoga miracle and managed her first sustained Head Stand during this class and I had a front row seat. I was so proud and happy for her. Thank you Kimberly for coming up with adjustments and alternate poses for Amanda so she can continue her practice during this time in our life.

So that's what it has been like lately. Less classes than I had planned, but I am feeling a bit more yogic than I have in a while. I will try to expand on that next time and will talk about the 100th class once it happens. Till then...

Tuesday, April 5, 2011

Class #67-85 With Several Instructors...

So I am still doing yoga. Despite an injury scare here and there (unsafe conditions at Gold's Gym and my competitive nature getting the best of me occasionally) I am still fairly healthy and still very committed to my practice. I am also still hopeful that I will get to 365 by the end of the year. Ten classes behind is not horrible and summer should give me an opportunity to make up some ground. It has obviously been awhile since my last post so here is one the bigger things that have been going on in my head and/or on my mat. I will try to cover some of the other (relatively) interesting events in my next post.

The Great Teacher Training Debate

So Amsa will soon be hosting a teacher training workshop for students looking to become certified instructors or just anyone wanting to deepen their practice. I really, really wanted to participate in it and the decision to not has been a very difficult struggle. At first I thought it was not a possibility at all due to scheduling conflicts with my job as a teacher. Then some of the semester dates changed and it looked like I could do it with only missing two classes. Then I found out there was a weird mandatory retreat that teachers at my job had to go to. This retreat combined with the significant financial commitment I would have to make meant that it probably was not a good idea. Still though, my mind kept racing like a hamster on a wheel as I pondered different scenarios like "If I sold these collectibles and then claimed to be sick..." or "What if I move my exam date and hope the students don't complain and then get to the retreat late..." or "What if I fake my death and then use the insurance money to fund the teacher training...". Despite the lingering appeal of that last option (it solves both the money and the time commitment issues, what could go wrong?) the finality of the situation has sunk in and I am now left examining the way I reacted. There were a lot of reasons why I wanted to be a part of the training and some of them were healthier than others. Let's take a look:

1)I want to get better. That sounds innocuous enough, but the line between self improvement and self punishment can be pretty thin. A part of me was certainly hoping that the training would be a magical shortcut to all the poses that currently feel just out of reach or I don't feel I am doing well enough for whatever reason. I am sure that if I had been able to do the training there would have been improvement in my asanas certainly, but making a decision based on impatience is probably a bad idea.

2)I want to hang out with friends. I have been fortunate enough to make several friendships at Amsa and there are a lot of people there I wish I could spend more time with. Oddly enough, a lot of the students and teachers are a lot more relaxing to be around than most random people I interact with. So I certainly think that the desire to spend my time with other like minded and supportive people is a healthy impulse. However, I am also slightly worried that after the class some of the other students will not like me as much once they are more advanced. I know that sounds crazy out loud, but I am insecure enough that I can't quite banish the nagging doubt.

3)I want to eventually teach. Yoga is a huge part of my life. My profession has been teacher for close to ten years. It seems natural that the two would eventually combine. This blog and conversations with other yogis have convinced me though that teaching needs to come after I have my internal stuff much more together. I strongly believe that every good teacher is passionate about their material and acts as a model for the principles they describe. There is more to Rhetoric than writing papers and there is a heck of a lot more to yoga than the poses.

Hopefully there will be another opportunity in the future for me to participate in teacher training. Until then, there are plenty of opportunities for me to learn and grow and some lessons that only time can teach.

See you soon!

Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Class #64-66 Yogalicious in Spartanburg with Monica and Marie

I recently went home to Spartanburg to visit my family during Spring Break. Recently, when I am back in my home town, I go check out the local yoga studio called Yogalicious. While it is not the little slice of Nirvana that is Amsa, it is fairly friendly and has its own quirky charms. Spartanburg is putting a lot of effort into revitalizing its downtown and so several older buildings have been re-purposed into different contemporary businesses. Yogalicious is part of this effort and is located inside an old building that I think used to be some sort of factory. It is bright and cheery inside the studio itself, but if you enter from one side of the building, it is like walking through a burnt out husk in some sort of post apocalyptic future. If anyone has seen the movie "9" I think Yogalicious is the kind of sanctuary the little rag people would use to do yoga in and recharge in-between dodging the war machine animals.
Anyways, I went to three very different classes and conveniently enough, learned three good lessons

. The first one was a yoga basics class that I was able to persuade my mom to join me in. I have previously taken classes with my brother and my wife and it is always a really special experience to share yoga with someone you care about. My mom taught me a really important lesson in this class. I often get frustrated when I can not do some of the poses, especially if it seems like everyone else is nailing it. My mom could not do around half of the poses since she was a true beginner and a little out of shape from her hectic life. At the end of the class though, she gave me a hug and told me how excited and happy she was to have done so much in her first class. I may have been stretching my body farther than her, but her heart was definitely opened wider than mine.

The second class I went to was Ashtanga style, fast paced with the heat cranked up. I didn't really learn something new during that class, but I found out something right afterwards that made me re-evaluate some of my foolish earlier decisions. In the yoga basics class I took with my mom, almost everyone was either a little older or out of shape or both. I consider myself to be out of shape also by the way. The instructor gave us fairly basic poses which makes sense given the class composition and the title of the class. However, one person on the mat next to me would consistently do more advanced variations with the instructor's encouragement. I was a little miffed since it was not like these variations were being offered to the class as a whole. Additionally, my cursory evaluation of the student had them pegged as a relative beginner due to appearance and the way they did one of the early poses (I think it was half moon). I really had to struggle to not attempt the more advanced variations even though clearly they were not being offered to me. On one pose, I even did the variation I am used to and was adjusted back into a simpler form. So I found out later that the "student" was actually another instructor at the studio. Even if they had not been though, there are so many things wrong with my attitude and decision making process here. I let circumstances outside my mat mess up what I was doing. I could have hurt myself. I disrespected the instructor by not following her instructions. I also judged someone I don't know based on a quick couple glances and their one momentary wobble in one pose. Judging is a bad practice in general and it was sloppy judgement at that. Lastly, the whole experience impacted my focus not just at the time, but during a subsequent class as well. I don't know if it makes it better or worse, but I know in my head not to do stuff like this. Just got to breath and take advantage of the opportunity the next practice offers.

My third class was a fun one and I didn't act like a petulant toddler, so that's a plus... It was a hour long yoga for lunch kinda standard class with a few neat twists. We had out mats set up as crosses and did a lot of transitions from lunges to straddles thanks to the additional padded space. The instructor, Marie, was very hands on and gave us all a lot of adjustments and opportunities to repeat poses until we made some improvement and could replicate it. We did some asanas a little different than I am used to with an overall emphasis on opening up and never rounding. I don't think I would want it to be the style I always had to do, but as a change of pace and a learning experience it was great. So I learned (or technically had reinforced I suppose) that new experiences can be fun and the more open you are, the more you can learn and enjoy.

So that was my little trip into the land of the licious. I will be back soon with more Amsa and maybe I can even get back to one class at a time...

Monday, March 14, 2011

Class #51-63 With Kimberly, Sara, Anne, Shannon and Eeyore?!

So in case you were wondering, I didn't die or quit yoga. The long delay has been due to two (that's fun to say, try it, due to two, due to two...)factors. Life has been overwhelmingly busy lately and I have been trying to find a way to express some yoga related internal struggles without sounding like either a spoiled brat or Hobbes (the Leviathan author, not the stuffed tiger). Basically, I have some self image problems and a lot of trust issues. Yoga is actually helping with both of those, but the process can sometimes be a painful one. As briefly as possible, I am not a big fan of myself and often feel compelled to compete to "make up" for how inadequate I feel. Of course that does not really fix anything. So even in yoga I find myself really wanting to do flashy poses and beat myself up when I am not making as much progress as I would like. The inconsistency of my body and what poses are available day in and day out is also a source or much frustration. Some days I am able to laugh at myself in a healthy way, mentally shrug at my misplaced priorities and then get refocus. Too many times I find myself glancing around the room and comparing or "competing" with my fellow students. Aside from the obvious physical health risks of pushing too hard to get into a pose I am not ready for, there is a lot of mental damage being done by tying my self worth with what I can do on my mat.

Thankfully, Amsa is a place to grow not only physically, but mentally and even spiritually. I am not going to go into the whole yoga as religion or religion substitute debate right now (though I have thought a lot about it) but I will say that I feel introspection and a careful examination of the choices we make in our daily lives is a logical progression as a person deepens their practice. So basically, I am saying that I have been making some pretty poor yoga related choices, but I am aware of these choices and I am also aware that simply being depressed or angry about those choices is not productive. I have been receiving a lot of good counsel recently and I think some of it is slowly sinking into my head. There is so much more to learn incorporate at Amsa than the asanas. Hopefully I can listen and absorb the wisdom available to me. My inner voice sounds a lot like the eternally pessimistic Eeyore right now, but it is pretty loud in there and who knows what I may find if I can still my thoughts. My wife Amanda recently told me that I am full of Pooh (I can only assume she meant the lovable happy bear. I thought asking for clarification might not be a good idea). Here's hoping that a grand adventure is just around the corner...

Friday, February 25, 2011

Class # 50 Yin and Flow Yoga with Kimberly

Well it took a little longer than I would have hoped, but 50 yoga classes is still pretty cool. No anger or melancholy this time, just thankfulness for all the friends I have supporting me and the great instructors I have helping me get better every class. You guys all rock! Since it is a bit of a milestone I am going to do the top five lessons I have learned so far so I (and others too I suppose) can look back later and have a snapshot of where I was at after class # 50.

1) It all comes back to the breath. The asanas are great and I really enjoy how they make me feel, but without the flow of the breath it is just not the same. I have had one class where I had halfway decent breath and it is a whole other level than yoga without good breath.

2) Yoga for me is all about connecting with others. I have met so many nice and nurturing people through yoga that it actually has shifted my perception of people in general a few percentage points. I know ultimately I am the only one who can choose to practice and push myself to go deeper, but knowing there are others around me who I like and respect makes me want to take this journey as far as I can.

3) Amsa Yoga is a very special place. You may not know this about me if you know me through yoga, but I can be kind of a grumpy guy. Reality often falls short of my expectations. But class after class, the instructors at Amsa just keep helping me and the others students improve our bodies and minds with their knowledge and above all, their giving spirits. They "namaste"d me when I could not namaste myself. Thank you.

4) Every day, every class, every pose is different. Someday I am going to internalize this. For now I just have to keep reminding myself that yoga is a winding road and not a straight path up a mountain. Some days certain poses and variations will be available and some days they will be not. All I can is give it my all and make peace with what is not safely attainable.

5) It is okay to smile. Yoga and life can be fun even if you are trying really hard. Funny things happen and they should be accepted as gifts and not scornfully discarded. If you can't laugh and share with those around you, what's the point?

Well that's what I have gotten out of yoga so far. Thanks for reading and feel free to stick around for the next 300 or so...



P.S. Thanks Kimberly for helping with my half moon pose today and for your patience in general. Yoga Explosion!

Class #49 Slow Mindful Flow with Sara

This class was a little weird but wound up going really well. Begin Giant TangentYoga seems to be largely mental. At the very least, my personal practice has wild fluctuations that I attribute mostly to my fluctuating mental states. So shortly before this class started I was a bit put out by some actions that I would consider faux pas. I won't go into them other than to say the person I was offended by is not anyone that you would know if you are reading this. If my act was better together than I would not have been annoyed in the first place or even if I was annoyed, I would have been able to simply note it, detach, and continue on. Neither of those things happened. Instead I wound up in a mental place I have not been in awhile. As I have mentioned before, I used to be very competitive and active with a variety of mental pursuits you can play in tournament settings. Most of the times I have been successful, I have had a bit of a chip on my shoulder and played mad but focused. Since I have gotten into yoga, it's not really a frame of mind that I have had that often and I am fine with that. Yoga has helped me be a kinder and more patient person and if that takes a bit of my competitive edge away, that is a good trade for both me and my loved ones. Anyways, for whatever reason I found myself practicing this class mad but focused. End Giant Tangent

Good: Welcome back Standing Forward Bend Uttanasana http://www.yogajournal.com/poses/478 ! An old favorite was back and better than ever as I got the palms of my hands on the floor next to my feet. I don't remember doing that before. While it is more than possible that I have found a way to mess up one of the simplest poses in yoga, for now I am pumped that I made some progress.

Bad: Aside from my omnipresent breathing issues I am pretty much okay with how most of the asanas went. I had some trouble keeping balance and had to come out in one side of Dancer Pose http://www.yogajournal.com/poses/936 but if you had told me a couple months ago that I could do it at all I would have just laughed. I also just took a breath and got ready for whatever would come next, which is a better response than I usually have when I mess up.

Yummy: I am definitely getting into a better rhythm with Sara. It is hard for me to explain, but some of the focuses and transitions make more sense to my body now that I am a little more flexible. It's kinda like rereading a good book. You get some fun stuff the first time or two through and then you get some really cool details and additional layers of depth later on. I also really appreciate the adjustments she gave that helped me maximize some of the stretches and twists we got into.

So check back soon for #50 and wish me luck as I try to make some ground up this weekend.

Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Class #48 Yoga for Lunch with Anne

Mmmm. Lunch yoga! I missed Pam's "breakfast" yoga so I was plenty hungry to stock up on some yummy
asanas before heading off to teach. Luckily, Anne was there to dish out some heaping helpings of delicious twists and wholesome core strength builders. Dang it, I have got to stop writing these when I am hungry or learn to make better metaphors. Anyways, here are some of the highlights:

Good: I am sure we have done it before, but I do not remember Shiva Twist PARIVRTTA NATARAJASANA in previous classes. Old or new, it is pretty sweet and definitely fun. Curiously, yoga journal does not seem to have a picture of it. I suppose it is possible I am misspelling it, but it's such a simple phrase...

Bad: Half Moon Ardha Chandrasana http://www.yogajournal.com/poses/784 has been one of my favorite poses for awhile, but like a delicate flower it seems to require a lot of love and attention to stay healthy and beautiful. Whenever I neglect half moon it wilts until I give it the time and attention it deserves. So I got through one Half Moon, but my other side was off kilter and wonky (that's an advanced technical yoga term). It's okay, I missed you Half Moon and we'll get you wholly back together in no time.

Yummy: Just really digging Anne's classes and especially the transitions lately. I am sure all the twists we did had nothing to do with how much I enjoyed it... It was also cool to see Queen of Broccoli and all around green thumber Christine. Good times all around.

Getting close to #50. Keeping the dream alive. See you soon!